THE DECADE IS OVER....GO CRAZY
helloooooo fam! what's up?! y'all i can't believe this decade is over! it's so crazy! i've done so many things through the years. in this post i'm just going to be spilling my guts because a lot has happened. it's going to be about little things about me and this decade.
photos. photos are a way to remember the past in a way so special to you. it's how you saw the moment. sometimes i'm scared of my "last photo" with someone. the last photo you took with someone who passed or has gone away. that's why i've always taken pictures. i want to remember that moment, what i was thinking, what we were just talking about, all of it. i'm so attached to each passing moment that pictures are a way to hold on to it forever.
i've always been me. i don't care what people think of me. you like me good, if you don't that's good too. every since i was little i've had this attitude. and about 2 years ago my fashion and "personality" just wasn't me. i began to change. i didn't feel like i was being my true authentic self. this year was really my year. i felt like i was really being me, with God, myself, my family and friends.
photos. photos are a way to remember the past in a way so special to you. it's how you saw the moment. sometimes i'm scared of my "last photo" with someone. the last photo you took with someone who passed or has gone away. that's why i've always taken pictures. i want to remember that moment, what i was thinking, what we were just talking about, all of it. i'm so attached to each passing moment that pictures are a way to hold on to it forever.
i've always been me. i don't care what people think of me. you like me good, if you don't that's good too. every since i was little i've had this attitude. and about 2 years ago my fashion and "personality" just wasn't me. i began to change. i didn't feel like i was being my true authentic self. this year was really my year. i felt like i was really being me, with God, myself, my family and friends.
"it's ok. you just forgot who you are. welcome back."
long hugs are my way of saying "i love you". i'm a touchy feely type. it's how i feel/give love. you never know if it's the last time your going to be with a person. hug them, tell them you love them. there are a few things i regret and wish i could change from the past. i wish i would have held them longer, smiled at them one more time.
"sometimes i just have to stop, close my eyes and hug you, even if it's only in my mind."
my whole life we've traveled. to Costa Rica, to Disney, to a cross country trip in 2018. not to be snotty or anything but my life is amazing! i'm always on a new adventure and doing cool things with my family. i am so grateful for all the opportunities that God has given me and my family. the last few years that we've traveled have just been so amazing!
this decade has taught me that boys suck. (not all boys, but most of them lol) they break your heart and your stuck picking up all of the pieces. your mind is your worst enemy. you make up all of these things in your mind that you wish would happen. and your stupid enough to think just maybe this time it will happen. i have to keep reminding myself that they are immature, not ready for commitment, and they may flirt with you, but your probably not the only one they flirt with. july through september-october-ish i was picking up pieces. i was picking up pieces that had been a long time in the making. and it sucks when it was all made up in your mind. and i know i didn't go through all that for nothing. but it feels like that sometimes.
this decade has taught me that boys suck. (not all boys, but most of them lol) they break your heart and your stuck picking up all of the pieces. your mind is your worst enemy. you make up all of these things in your mind that you wish would happen. and your stupid enough to think just maybe this time it will happen. i have to keep reminding myself that they are immature, not ready for commitment, and they may flirt with you, but your probably not the only one they flirt with. july through september-october-ish i was picking up pieces. i was picking up pieces that had been a long time in the making. and it sucks when it was all made up in your mind. and i know i didn't go through all that for nothing. but it feels like that sometimes.
" he was never mine, but losing him broke my heart."
fake friends. i've had my share in fake friends this decade. i move on quick though, maybe not the 1st time but the ones that followed made me stronger. i've learned not to trust so fast. you know we're close friends if we text almost everyday, if you know what's up in my "tragic love life" lol, or if you know my favorite candy is snickers and you get me a whole bag for my birthday. my people are the best people. i like my circle of friends. i'm glad i've struggled because if i hadn't, maybe i wouldn't have met the people i know and have today.
"we click. there aren't many people that you just "click" with, and when you find those people, you don't just let them go."
well i hope you liked reading this post of me just saying random things lol.
LAST POST OF THE DECADE!!!GO CRAZY!!! AHHHH!!!!!!GO STUPID!!!!!! AHHHH!!!!
hello new decade! i'm open to your new adventures, new friends, new goals. i hope your as great as the last one!
until next time!
♡
peace out 2019!
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